Obligatory Sports Babe

So yesterday I scoffed at the idea of using that Pussycat Dolls girl as the Obligatory Sports Babe-- which I'd considered, because it turns out she's F1 Champ Lewis Hamilton's girlfriend. Well... then I saw that she appears in this new unwatchably-long foot-fetishy Nike commercial with LeBron James. So... whatever... I've changed my tune. OK?

A Chicago Tradition Gets Slightly More Pathetic

Apparently there is a building near Wrigley field that, since 1988, has displayed the number of years since the Cubs last won the division, the pennant, and the World Series. Problem is, those ever-optimistic fans never expected that their team would make it to 100 years without a title, and in recent fans wondered how they'd make room for an extra digit. Well, fear not Cubs fans, they've already accommodated, so your patheticness will remain on display for years and years. And years. (And years).

I Can't Decide Which Is Better

Yao somehow blowing a dunk...

Or Joe Johnson, with the game on the line, nailing a three from about a mile out like it was nothing...

Neither of These Have to Do With Sports. What's Your Point?

It's the 20 Manliest Moustaches and Beards From Facial Hair History (though Rollie Fingers did make the list, so I guess that counts, right?). And... it's also the 10 hottest Jessica Biel videos. Because... why not?

Pretty Much Every Current Goalie Mask

This gallery from Sports Illustrated is pretty much exactly what the heading says.

Somebody Owns A Cardboard Cutout of Cole Hamels

... and Joe Sports Fan tracked her down for an interview.

I Have No Idea What the Hell This Is...

But this guy has some serious chompers on him, and a neck. And while that may not seem impressive now, just wait.

Also... how the hell does anybody learn they can do something like this?