Obligatory Sports Babe

So Tim Tebow has decided that rather than diving headfirst into being an NFL bust, he's going to return to the University of Florida to cement his legacy as possibly the greatest NCAA player ever. I was going to make a lame crack about all the UF girls in this gallery at Gunaxin being the reason he's staying. But then I remembered that this here is his girlfriend-- and from there, I think you'll agree, the choice of which picture to post was obvious.

Michael Young is a Team Player

Despite being a terrible fielder, Michael Young won a Gold Glove at shortstop this year. This most likely happened because the gold gloves are a complete joke, as exemplified by Derek Jeter constantly winning them, and by Rafael Palmeiro's 1999 trophy for defensive excellence at first base-- where he had played a grand total of 28 games. Unfortunately for Texas, that hasn't stopped Young from asking for a trade because the Rangers had the audacity to ask him to play third base so that a better-fielding prospect won't be stuck behind the glove of shitty-fielding Michael Young.

In Case You Forgot, Road House is Still Awesome

And COED Magazine has the reasons to prove it, which include awesomeness staples "boot blade" and "six different pairs of boobs". The rewatchability on this one is extremely high, and I am now going to have to pass out to it next time I stumble home drunk. Thanks internet!

Tecmo Will Save You

Gunaxin explains how four NFL teams could be helped by the running backs they employed in the greatest sports video game ever, Tecmo Super Bowl.

Buy Your Ping Pong Balls Before They Get Banned

Because I'm sure that you're not going to be able to get them anywhere after an article that Gorilla Mask is pointing us to gets around. Why do I say that? Because it explains how you can hallucinate by laying down with halved ping pong balls taped over your eyes, and a radio playing static. Fun, and all-natural, kids! Thanks Boston Globe!

Late-Morning Wake Up

If the coffee isn't doing it for you, maybe this friendly guy will help you start the day fresh. . .