Obligatory Sports Babe

Today we have Melina Pitra, a model from Argentina who is dating outstandingly-named goalkeeper Fabian Assman, who currently plays for Independiente, but is rumoured to be a target of Chelsea. These two end up on Who Ate All the Pies’ outstanding list of the top 10 footballers who are punching above their weight, when it comes to WAGs—because, as they point out, he looks like this.

Are You Kidding Me?

“Cristiano Ronaldo’s penchant for super-tight shorts has created a new market for retailers that could soon dwarf the soccer star’s $131 million transfer to Real Madrid,” says Reuters. “British department stores group Debenhams said on Thursday sales of skimpy shorts leapt over 117 percent in the last week, after Ronaldo was photographed sporting his skin-tight style on holiday in the United States.”

Be Proud, Jays Fans

ESPN’s “Sports Guy”, Bill Simmons, who was really awesome a few years ago, broke down each era of major league baseball, trying to figure out which was the purest. And he’s come up with a five year span: 1988-1992. Of course, that’s stupid, because it was the height of the Canseco-McGwire A’s, but still, the Jays went to the ALCS thrice, winning the World Series once in baseball’s “purest” era, so I guess we’ll take it.

Comment

Come on. Seriously. How much did MLSE pay the Montreal Impact? I’m not normally a conspiracy theorist, but I watched the Impact during their run in the CONCACAF Champions League, and I follow TFC, and there’s simply no way a result so perfect ever happens like it did last night, when TFC needed a four goal victory, and won 6-1 to take the Nutralite Canadian Championship away from Vancouver.

Quickly

Holy Taco has shit flying into crowds—mostly baseball bats—an essay in pictures.

The same guy has been the San Diego Chicken for 35 years, says the AP, and he’s from London, Ontario!

Probably the wrong website to put this on, but Henry Blodget in Advertising Age says that TV is as fucked now as newspapers were five years ago.

Speaking of newspapers, my good friend Chris Levoir of the Mark Inside—who are about to blow up, book that—has been writing a daily diary for the National Post this week, leading up to NXNE. Unfortunately editors butchered all but the first one—which you can read here.

If you’re a baseball team and you’re going to fire your manager, now is the time, says the Wall Street Journal.

Bored? This site will help.

Shark Mascot

Columbian club Junior Tiburon, With Leather has discovered, has an A-1 Quality mascot.